THE O'ROYALLY FACTOR

Join Persia's pompousest pundit, Bill O'Royally, as he sucks up to the King, sticks it to Mordechai, and welcomes Haman to the "No-Semite Zone."

ANNOUNCER

And now, welcome to The O’Royally Factor - with your host, Bill O’Royally!

O’ROYALLY

Thank you, thank you, want to welcome you folks back to The Factor. Joining me tonight in the Zone is the executive director for the Persian Jewish Congress. Please give a warm O’Royally welcome to Mordechai!

MORDECHAI

Thanks, Bill. And by the way, it’s actually the Persian Jewish Committee.
(to audience)
Like I would work for PJCongress.

O’ROYALLY

So let’s just kick things off. You have a problem with a policy of our King’s?

MORDECHAI

That’s right. His decree to wipe out the Jewish people. He has ordered that, by Adar--

O’ROYALLY

Alright, let me cut you off right there, Mr. Chai. What I’m hearing from you already is that same, tired old affirmative-action “boo-hoo-hoo-we’re-a-persecuted-minority-being-held-down-by-‘Da Monarch’” nonsense.

...